At The Edge of Goodbye

When the magic's fading...something's bound to cease,
This great journey created its own memories;
Now's the time to draw the curtains down,
To ponder the path of thy feet;

It is not goodbye, but rather "see you later",
To the dear friends i look up to and treated with regard;
With your presence in my existence,
You made me unto a finer person.

So, this is it my bros...GOODBYE;
For i have reached the point of turning away,
While i lick my wounds and recuperate;
Someday, we'll bump, shake hands and say 
"It has been a good day"...

PH Blog Awards Concluded

 

 

The Philippine Blog Awards has spoken. And the deserving winners were posted yesterday. Congratulations to the big winners for this year, 2004:

Kutitots for The Best Blog Site for 2004. I am also extending my greetings to my friend Ferdz's Ironwulf for making it to the top 3.

Kwentong Tambay of BatJay bro for The Best Blogger of 2004.

TechnoBiography for The Most Informative Blog for 2004.

Would also like to congratulate dude, dizzy, and yours truly, metal who have been until the finals for this year's awards.

For all the 365 entries, nominated right from the start...everyone is a winner!

A Busy Sunday For The Family

The sun was up, shining with glory, woke up early with the cock's crow. My wife and I had to prepare for the early morning mass. Homily was good...it was about things to be thankful. A gracious breakfast for the soul.

Afterwards, we drove to an Antipolo court for a nice, exhausting badminton play...get all those persistent fats off the belly, stretch those fluffy muscles and re-work on those regressing joints. Never thought my eldest daughter was that good in badminton. Sometimes I miss watching these kids grow.

A mincing lunch at a nearby Max's Fried Chicken restaurant to replenish the sweat from the previous play...it was really good to the last bone.
 

After lunch, I have to accompany our daughter for their school's anniversary parade until the late afternoon. She was in their band's amusing clothes to play her lire.

We got back to Antipolo again for some child's play...treat the kids to the "peryahan", a local carnival for the city's forthcoming fiesta (December 8: Feast of the Voyage Patron Saint, Immaculate Conception). The kids really enjoyed the rides as i enjoyed ticking those numbers on the bingo. Unfortunately, i've missed all the pots, but was delighted on the "tiangge" stuff and got all the money's worth.
 

 

 

For the last course, me and my barkada went to the nearby karaoke bar for some late cold beer and listen to some oozing riffs from a local rock band.

 

Yesterday has been a good day, a simple one yet far more better than the other pleasure's in life. We have to be thankful for the Lord's many blessings to us, and may we learn to do that every day — not just on Thanksgiving. Sometimes we also need to be "just plain thankful": that is to say, we need to be grateful simply because we’re conscious of God’s unconditional love and his many blessings.

 

Kelan ang Una?

Naisulat ko ito noon pang Oktobre 14, 2004 (aking kaarawan), ngayon ko lang lakas-loob na mailalathala sa kadahilanang wala na akong ibang mailathala...

Noong araw na sumulat ako ng artikulo patungkol sa bisyong sigarilyo...me tanong doon kung "kelan ang aking unang yosi" at pabiglang sumaglit sa aking alaala ang mga nakaraan. Mabuti man, masama o mababaw, ito'y naging parte rin ng aking buhay. Naisip ko, makapagsulat ng mga panyayaring may katanungang "kelan ang una..." at nang makapagbalik-tanaw. Hindi ito naisulat sa pagkakasunod-sunod ng pangyayari.

Kelan ang aking unang pag-ibig?: 2nd year ako noon sa kolehiyo, hinding-hindi ko malilimulan si Marivic (maganda, mahinhin at kamukha ni Anna Marie Gutierez ng sumikat na "Scorpio Nights"), una kong natanaw sa bintana ng tinutuluyang boarding house sa Baguio. Di ko talaga napigil ang aking sarili, pagibig sa unang tingin, kumatok ako sa tinitirhan niya noon at kapal-mukhang nagpakilala sa sa kanya. Pinalad naman ako sa aking mahabang paniningalang-pugad, nag-on kami ng dalawang taon at nagkahiwalay din sa masakit na dahilan. Dinamdam ko yun at di nanligaw uli sa iba ng higit 4 na taon.

Kelan ang aking totoong pag-ibig?: Nang makilala ko ang aking naging asawa, si Liezel. Nakikituloy siya sa bahay ng kanyang tiya na me tindahan kung saan ako bumibili. Me hawak akong sukling barya noon, pinakilala ako sa kanya ng kanyang tiyahin at sa aking kaba at kalituhan, nabitawan ko ang aking hawak na barya at sumabog ito sa lupa. Ngiti lang ang tugon nya sa akin. Mula noon, di ko na siya nilubayan, siya nga ang aking nakatuluyan at ina ngayon ng aking mga anak.

Kelan ako unang nagkaroon ng tapat na kaibigan?: Edad 9 nang makilala ko si best friend Zaldy...sa araw-araw na ginawa ng Diyos, kami ang laging magkasama, sa paglalaro, sa init ng araw, sa galaan, sa pagkain, sa kalukohan. Sa kanya ako natutong gumuhit...talagang napakagaling nya. Ito na ang aking naging unang hilig... guhit dito, guhit dun, maski sa lupa...guhit. Napatunayan ko ang aking sarili nang sumali ako sa isang "poster making contest" sa unibersidad...3rd year college ako. Isa ako sa 10 runner-ups at ok na sa 'kin yun...sa mahigit 100 entries, nasa top 10 ako. Ang tema noon ay tungkol sa pag-iwas sa droga at ang aking dibuho (guhit sa charcoal) ay isang taong nakataob sa loob ng malaking ineksiyon (syringe) na parang nalunod sa tubig, at ang naging pamagat at mensahe ay "Drug Addiction leads one to damnation". Syento sinkwenta (150) pesos ang consolation prize at naipang-date ko na 'yon.

Kelan ang aking unang paghanga?: Ah, si Raquel, pinakakyut na kakalse ko sa Grade 3, palagi ko siyang sinusundan noon at binibigyan ng mumurahing tsokolate. Maaga akong lumandi at doon ko unang na-appreciate ang kagandahan ng isang babae.

Kelan ako unang nangarap?: Grade 6 sa elementarya, dahil sa gumuguhit na ako noon, ako ang artist sa aming eskuwela. Nagpagawa sa akin ang aming guro ng isang dibuho na nakalarawan lahat ng aking klasmeyt na naisasalarawan ang kanya-kanyang mga ambisyon, at ang titulo... "What Will I Be, 10 Years From Now?". Doon ko nasabi na magiging enginyero ako...at nagkatotoo nga.

Kelan ang una kong dalamhati?: Nang pumanaw ang aking mahal na lolo...kami ang laging magkasama nang bata pa ako at napakarami kong natutunan sa kanya. Isa siyang magsasaka (di sya ang nagsasaka pero sya ang namamahala ng sakain) at naituro sa akin lahat ng gawain sa bukid, pagmintena ng palaisdaan, paggawa ng bahay-kubo, pati pagsasabong ay natutunan ko sa kanya. Ako'y akay-akay palagi sa lahat ng kanyang lakarin at halos di naghihiwalay, pinakamapait na luha ang lumabas sa aking mata ng siya ay pumanaw.

Kelan ang aking unang tikim ng alak?: 3rd year high school, maalala ko pa...nag-eskapo sa klase kami ng mga barkada at nagtambay sa kanilang bahay...nagpatugtog siya ng bagong awit noon ni Paul McCartney na "Coming Up" at naglabas ng Ginebrang bilog at 7-UP. Yun ang una kong tikim ng alak at yun din ang una kong pagsuka.

Kelan ang una kong trip sa rak en rol?: 2nd year sa high school, narinig ko ang unang kanta ng Cars na "Let's Go" at mula noon di ko na nilubayan ang rock. Sumunod na lumabas ang "Lovedrive" LP ng Scorpions at lalo akong nahibang sa ganiyong tema ng musika. Unang-una kong LP noon ay ang KISS Alive II na nairegalo sa akin ng aking tatay. Hanggang ngayon, ito pa rin aking musika.

Kelan ang una (at huli) na nakatikim ng preso si metal?: 17 anos ako noon, semestral break, bakasyon sa probinsya, nagkita-kita kami ng barkada at nag-inom hanggang madaling-araw. Pinaghalo-halo namin ang inuming beer, gin at coke sa iisang pitsel...sa bagsik at dami ng inumin, lahat kami'y nawala sa sarili. Pagkatapos ng session, sabay-sabay kaming nag-uwian...pagapang. Napadaan kami sa harap ng Police Station at sa kasamaang palad, nakita kami ng mga pulis at lahat kami ay naipasok sa preso hanggang mahimasmasan. "Loitering" daw ang dahilan pero di naman kinasuhan ng pormal. Galit na galit sa akin ang aking mga magulang...'san-linggo yata akong nasermunan at pinagbantaan na pag di nagbago ay sisipain palabas ng bahay.

Kelan unang nawala ng aking pagkalalake?: Birthday ko noon, papasok ng edad 17, pagkatapos ng kaunting salu-salo, dumating ang aking tiyuhin at sinabi sa akin na oras na. Pumunta kami sa karatig bayan at dinala ako sa isang kuwarto na medyo madilim at me pulang ilaw sa kanto ng dingding. Ilang sandali pa lang ay me pumasok na babae na ewan kung saang lupalop galing at nangyari ang dapat magyari (pasensya na, di ko mai-detalye ang nangyari). Walang nasabi ang babae kundi "grabe ka"...

Kelan ako unang nagka-interes sa blogging?: lazy sunday ng July 4, 2004...walang magawa, nag-surf sa internet at napunta ako sa site ni "the mushpit". Nagbasa-basa at napagtanto na ang blog ay isang journal ng buhay, kuro-kuro, insights, paniniwala, interaction ng mga taong may pananaw. Naibigan ko ang blog at gumawa rin para sa aking sarili...nag-aral ng kaunting html, css, graphics editing at macromedia at nakabuo naman ng site na makapagrerepresenta ng aking personalidad o persona. Dito ko naibubuhos ang aking mga problema, hinaing, mga kuwento (seryoso man, nakakatawa o mais), obserbasyon o kahit ano pa man. Hindi na nakukumpleto ang aking araw hanggat di ko nabibisita ang mga kinagigiliwan kong kapwa bloggers...ito ay parte na ng aking buhay.

Marami pa akong kuwentong una, mga karanasang di ko na rin maisusulat sa kadahilanang ito ay medyo personal at makabubuting para sa akin na lang ang mga ito. Maipagmamalaki ko lang na gaano man kabuti o kasama ang mga karanasan, ito ay bahagi, karugtong ng aking pagkalalang, nakapagturo sa akin para sa pagbabago, humubog para sa mas mabuting pagkatao.

Coracho...Walang Pahinga

Para akong natuyuan ng katas ngayong araw na 'to...ihi lang ang pahinga. Puwede na rin akong tawaging "ang lalakeng walang pahinga".

Naka-leave kasi ang bossing ko, umuwi ng Zamboanga para sa kanyang taunang bakasyon grande at as usual, oic ako sa departamento. Lahat kasi ng meeting niya sinasalo ko, idagdag pa 'yong sarili kong meeting...suma-total, doble. Kabi-kabilaang meeting na buti sana kung lahat ay kaiga-igaya, yung iba, talagang nakakaantok. Kanina lang, pinakahuli na dinaluhan ko ay ang operations meeting na natapos ng alas onse y medya. Pagkakain ng tanghalian, patunaw ng kaunti at nagtawag uli ng panibagong pulong, alas dose y medya. Ito nama'y para sa nalalapit na Christmas party. Pinag-usapan namin kung ano ang itatanghal ng management team, dumating kasi ang nai-hire na choreographer at nai-presenta ang mga binabalak na gagawin.

Pagkatapos ng meeting, balik ako sa aking opisina para naman saguting ang mga e-mails na kung anu-anong information na hinihingi at mga reports ko na nangangamoy na sa tagal at di matapus-tapos. May taga-Meralco na nangangailangan ng mga power transformer specifications. May taga-Technical Center (sa Malaysia) na nangangailang ng mga electrical single line diagram ng power distribution para sa kanilang Fault Study, may iba naman nag-iimbita ng mga seminars. Pinakamaganda 'atang natanggap kong mail kanina ay yung isang clip tungkol sa isang taga-CEU na sekretong nakunan sa isang motel...padala ng isang ka-opisina kong mahilig o pwede na rin nating tawagin na marunong magmalasakit sa kapwa lalake.

Kauupo ko lang, tumawag naman itong division manager dito at may bagay na gustong linawin at idiskusyon. Suya, kababalik ko lang, ayan..tawag uli (di ko lang masabi na kung sino me kailangan, siya ang lumapit)! Pagkatapos ng pag-uusap, balik ako sa opis ko na sana eh malapit, pero halos 200 meters na lalakarin. Kauupo ko lang, ayan na ang isang bata kong technician...naglalambing na panoorin ko raw ang practice nila sa kanila ring presentasyon sa x'mas party. Di na rin ako umayaw, hangga't maari kasi ayoko silang mapahiya. Gusto ko rin namang ipakita ang suporta ko sa kanilang ginagawa. Kaya, ang labas ko sa planta kanina, mga alas otso na ng gabi.

Kaya ito ako ngayun, masakit ang ulo pero nagbo-blog pa rin (syempre)...Ay, hirap talaga kumita ng pera...

The Art of Eating Intelligently

I was in Makati today, my company's head office at the PBCom Towers, for a meeting on critical spare parts. The objective of the program is that, all the company's plants in the Philippines (Lafarge have 7 cement plants here: 2 in Rizal, 2 in Bulacan, 1 in Bataan, 1 in Cebu and 1 in Iligan) must have a common database of equipment and available spare parts which could serve as a reference during emergencies. This would greatly lessen downtime, control maintenance costs and eventually improve the company's reliability, one of the business unit's objective, second to safety.

I was actually in lieu of our Maintenance Division Manager who happens to be in Baguio City as part of the delegate to accept an award for the company as the Safest Cement Plant in the Phils for this year (award given by the Mines & Geosciences Bureau). And President Arroyo, herself, will be the one to personally hand the award.

The meeting was good and it ended until 12 o'clock noon. The Reliability Consulant, Mr. Weston, a Canadian, asked us to join him for a lunch before we heed to our respective homes. Eight of us walked in to this little restaurant, had a seat and scan the menu. So, i thought this is an italian restaurant since the words from the menu were in itaian and i don't even understand a single word. The waiter in a bow tie was about to take our individual orders and i said that i don't understand the menu. I politely asked what's for lunch and he eagerly replied with italian- sounding words that made me look like a fool. Well, it made me smile and again politely asked him to say it in simple terms. Then he replied: "the first one is a roasted beef, 2nd one is a fish in special sauce, and the last choice would be some prawns...soooo...

We had salad in sesame oil for the appetizer and the main course...i had a slice of fish with rice. Last one was a slice of pineapple (fresh from the can) with cream for dessert. The best part was with the bill...Mr. Weston, with no expression on his face, got the bill and hand his credit card. When everything was settled, i can't help myself but ask my colleage, who was seating right beside him and had a peek on the bill, how much was in it. He uttered it was more than 8 thousand pesos. If i were the one who would pay that bill, i would surely faint...for a food like that which costs more that a thousand pesos per plate.

That was bullshit...i thought that this was not a very special day just to have a lunch that costs that much. Maski di ako ang nagbayad, nanghihinayang talaga ako...sa hirap ng buhay ngayon. Aling Nena, the neighbor's carenderia cook, could prepare a food much better than that just for a few pesos. Oh, well.

When The Ship Comes In

Noong nakaraang Martes, pagkatapos ng aming meeting, hinaltak ako ni Bill McDonald, ang aming Scottish plant manager para sa isang seryosong usapan (sabagay, puro seryoso naman palagi ang usapan). Hiningi na nya ang aking kasagutan...tatlong linggo na kasi siyang nanliligaw sa akin. Pero di sa pag-ibig ang panliligaw (ano siya hilo?), gusto nya akong mag-head ng isang department dito na matagal ng walang namumuno.

Three weeks ago, pinatawag nya ako at nai-offer nga itong posisyon. Sabi nya ay para raw sa aking future at sigurado raw sya na kaya ko...oras na raw para sa mas mabigat na responsibilidad. Ang posisyon kasing ito ay kakaiba sa nakaugalian kong gawin...na ginagawa ko sa loob ng 16 na taon *sige, mabibisto na talaga edad ko*. Napaka-technical ang ginagawa ko ngayun...ito'y sa process at automation and it involves system engineering (automating a process plant)...it is an electrical engineering at talagang punong-puno ng paghamon, di nakakasawa, kada araw, iba't-iba ang ginagawa...walang redundancy ika nga . Pero itong binibigay sa akin ngayon ay tungkol naman sa maintenance system...it involves scheduling, level inspections, technical analysis. In short, pamamahala ng isang programa o systema para ma-optimize mo ang reliability ng planta. Ito'y napakahalaga sa tagumpay ng isang business unit. Engineering pa rin pero mababawasan na ang teknikalidad...madadagdagan ang management aspect o pamamahala sa isang systema.

Tatlong beses na rin akong pinatawag-tawag sa opisina ni Boss Bill at nagtatanong kong napag-isipan ko na. Kailangan ko rin timbangin ang lahat ng posibilidad bago ako magdesisyon. Tinanung ko ang aking mga kamag-anak at mga kaibigan...para pandagdag sa pagbibigay linaw...suportado naman nila ako. Noong Martes nga, tinanggap ko na, di na ako nakaayaw. Mahihiwalay na ako sa aking mga kasama at kaibigan sa trabaho na nakaulayaw ko sa mahabang panahon. Di naman kami magkakahiway sa planta, dito pa rin naman ako pero ang interaction namin ay mababawasan na. Ibang grupo na ang aking makakasalamuha, at ako ang mamumuno sa kanila. Mag-uumpisa na ang transition period, at sa January, 2005...goodbye Senior Systems & Automation Engineer...hello Methods Manager.

Noong Martes nga ay tuwang-tuwa si Bill sa aking kasagutan...at binigyan naman ako ng katiyakan na tutulungan ako sa aking bagong pagsubok. Habang sinusulat ko ito, naalala ko ang isang linya sa pelikulang Spiderman...nabanggit ng tiyuhin ni Peter habang papalabas sa taxi: "Great power comes with great responsibility".

Overdrive

I am contented today...at last i have renewed my driver's license after almost a month of obsolescence (i am too lazy to have it renewed then). Now i can drive again. Well, i am happy not because i have a new id, but because of the process of renewal. I mean, it took me only an hour with the lamenated id already on my hand...that was fast comparing it 3 years ago when i had my old one...it took me almost a day for the process of the temporary id and five or six fucking long months for the lamenated one...pabalik-balik ka pa para i-follow up kung available na.

Previously, i did it in a small town here in Rizal...that was in LTO, Angono. A lot of swarming fixers, the rooms were congested, the place was in dis-array *you bet you can compare it to a tiangge market*, people are not that friendly. But now i decided to have it renewed here in LTO Pasig...Capitol of Rizal. The place was nicer, people were much friendlier, no fixers *miracle*, no red tapes, the office was more comforable. The system was good.

I have to say this to commend the good services i just had today. Syempre, pag nainis tayo sa isang departamento o agency ng gobyerno dahil masama at bulok ang serbisyo, nagrereklamo tayo, naiinis pero pag nakatanggap naman at nasiyahan sa magandang serbisyo, i think it is but proper to praise them...LTO Pasig...two thumbs-up ka!!!

Ok, pwede na naman maglakwatsa...magdrive ng malayo-layo... yipee!

Magda-drive ako hanggang Baguio
Magda-drive ako hanggang Bicol
Magda-drive ako hanggang Batangas
Tapos magswi-swimming d'on sa beach

Isasama ko ang girlfriend ko
Isasama ko kahit sinong may gusto
Kahit may kasama siyang aso
Basta't meron siyang dalang sariling buto
Magdadala ako ng pagkain
Burger, fries, tapsilog at siopao

Magda-drive ako hanggang Visayas
Magda-drive ako hanggang sa Mindanao
Magda-drive ako buong taon
Magda-drive ako habang buhay
Magda-drive ako hanggang buwan

Please, please lang turuan mo akong mag-drive
Gusto kong matutong magdrive(kahit na walang kotse)
Gusto kong matutong magdrive(kahit na walang lisensya)

Bring the Boys Back Home

I had a deep urge yesterday...an urge to jam with my friends. After work i had to say goodbye to my wife, grab my strato guitar with a set of distortion and go straight to my cousin's house in Marikina...my cousin, Van Eric, the good-looking dentist who, afterall these years, plays his drums like there is no tomorrow. My other friends were there to complete the cast. I have to travel by jeepney, i am too lazy to drive and my driver license has expired anyway (october 14 was the last day of that card...too lazy to drive, too lazy to renew). Anyway, there are other ways to reach your destination. You drive, you walk, you run, ride a jeep, run a bike, fly...riding a jeep is the easiest.

When i reached my cousin's house, the guys were there but i had to have my rest first, connect the cables then we started to play some hard classics for about 3 hours or so. Bosyo, my tropang bassist was gyrating all over giving some jumps and could probably thinking he is the Korn's axeman. I said..."what the hell...?". He just smiled and continued his war dance. I gestured a finger cycling just beside my temple (means may topak ka na) and he got the meaning...his grin became wider, still continued his thing.

After the practice, all of us laid on the backyard grass for some rest. Then we started talking about our past. The crazy things we did, our struggles and we had been giggling like kids again until the late night. We had been long friends for a long time, since we were at our teens. Bosyo is my best friend since high school. He is the easy-go-lucky guy, he was crazy all the time, and still crazy up to now. No doubt, we call him the "wacko". And would you believe, he is a university teacher somewhere at the belt. Then there is Dinky, another high school friend who just came from Baguio for his 2-week vacation from work (a system engineer at the Texas Instruments). He is the serious type among us but plays the guitar at his best. He is our guardian, the "manong". Gerry, the throats, the unemployed guy, "palamunin ng magulang" but the most mabait (geek) among us. Speaks few words but easily grasps the lyrics in any song of interests. Van Eric, my cousin dentist, the handsome chickboy who thinks he is John Bonham...his motto: "Mind over Metal". The weird guy, who is always in-love, he oftens calls me to tell "insan, na first-love na naman ako"... (he'll kill me if he reads this). But mind you, one of the best drummers i've seen. Raul (remember the Si-Raul-O guy from bulacan, our long lost friend)...didn't make it, he is too pre-occupied.

We are brothers then, we are still brothers now. We had our share of laughter and tears, the struggles we've been through and each of us moulded to be tough to survive...Gerry, our poor friend who seldom have money in his pocket, is always grateful we are always there for him...we give him our support. Van Eric, though he is already a dentist still have a lot of immaturities, but we give him our understanding and guidance. This is friendship....though we don't have common objectives with our lives...friendship kept us one. Friends could come and go for whatever reasons there may be...but the spirit stays.

Remembering Them

Finally, All Souls Day is over...that was supposed to be held every 2nd of November. November 1 is the All Saints Day, a day for all the saints but as we practice, we honor our love ones who passed on the 1st. Oh well, it doesn't have to be on this day only...we have to remember them everyday, as much as possible. They were part of our lives...we would soon meet them (again?) on the other life.

I wasn't able to go home in our province to celebrate the holiday and visit the tombs of my Lolo, Lola, my sister and cousin. I just compensated my shortcoming by remembering them and offering them prayers. My folks understood that i won't be able to go home with my family, OIC kasi ako dito sa planta...bantay ng operation. I just spent my half-day on the tomb of my wife's uncle here at Antipolo. Inabot kami hanggang 9 pm bago umuwi sa bahay.

Laki na talaga ng pinagbago ng mga sementeryo ngayun at kung 'pano natin i-celebrate ang All Souls...comparing it 3 years, 4 years ago, mapapansin mo talaga. Pasikip na ng pasikip sa sementeryo...dati nagbabaon kami ng banig at nailalatag mo. Nakakatulog pa ako noon na unat ang paa. Kahapon, sisksikan na. Maghapon akong nakaiskwat na lang at talagang sumakit ang paa at pwet ko. Kaya pag-drive ko pauwi, talagang nakaramdam ako ng pagod.

Isa pang obserbasyon ko eh, medyo westernized na ang selebrasyon natin ngayon...ang mga kabataan, nagpaparaktis na rin ng Trick or Treat at 'yong iba ay nasa Halloween party na nakasuot pa ng iba't ibang costume. Well, wala namang masama dun, maganda nga eh...bu i hope na magtira rin tayo ng kaunting kaugalin tulad ng pagbisita nga sa mga mahal nating pumanaw at mag-offer ng dasal...afterall, para sa kanila naman ang araw na 'to.

Kagabi nga, naghatid ako ng mga bagets dito sa aming lugar papuntang kabayanan. May halloween party dun kaya ginawa akong driver. Well, ok lang yun...pinagdaanan ko naman ang ganun.

Sana, next year, makauwi naman ako sa probinsya para makabisita talaga ako sa mga puntod ng aking mga mahal at syempre family reunion din yun at para makita ko naman ang mga barkada ko. dun.

Power of a Filipino

Ey, guys...a good friend needs our support. His site is one of the entries, in fact hoping to be in the finals at the 7th Philippine Web Awards (PWA). A representation of a Filipino ingenuity on Web Designing...the power of creative imagination. This is John Louie's pet called Superluwi.com.

 
Come on friends, nothing to lose...we could cast our votes at the PWA site by registering first, then we could give our people's choice vote. I am in no way connected with the PWA, just a friend who gives his wishes to another friend.

Many thanks to you all!

Funny Yet Grand

Saturday
My wife and I had to travel to Baliuag, Bulacan to attend the wedding of an officemate, it was a 3-hour long drive from Rizal. I am not familiar with this town, kaya maraming beses kaming nawala...we have to ask every person we could find and ask for directions. Time is of the essence and we have to be on time. The ceremony was supposed to be starting at 4:30 pm (as stated on the invitation) and exactly, we were on time.

At the time we were in front of the church's gate, there was already a couple (in a kneeling position) at the altar facing the priest who was initiating the ceremony. My wife, who was one of the "ninangs", and I thought the wedding that we are supposed to attend to had already been started...so, I told her to just proceed and sit with the other sponsors. And so we did. Everybody were all eyes on us just to learn that it was somebody's wedding. Sa susunod pa pala yung kasal ng kakilala namin! I looked at my wife's eyes and without word, we both stood up poised, and exited from the church. We just gave a good laugh on what had happened...anyway, it was an honest mistake, a good experience.

The wedding started at around 5:30 pm at the Mt. Carmel Church, one of the nicest church i've seen. The groom, as i've said is my officemate and the lovely bride (standing at around 5'10" tall) is a native of that town. She belongs to a well-to-do family and in fact a niece of the town's mayor. What really amused me is how the couple prepared for their wedding...it is a grand one, flowers everywhere, chandeliers lighted, rose petals were scattered at the feet of the bride as she marches towards the altar, mass booklets distrubuted to everyone, dresses of the sponsors were nicely done. The ceremony was very solemn and orderly.

Reception followed in a local resort and the food was superb...hay, sarap, talagang nabusog ako. It is so inspiring to see a wedding so sincere, so archaic, so grand i wish i could marry again...not with another women but again to my wife...siyempre.

Sunday
This made my kids' day...i brought them to a nearby resort for a dip. I called my barkada and everybody enjoyed the sun and the water. Ah, life..still gratifying at times like these!

Missing the Starting Gun

I was sooooo pissed today! I was supposed to have a meeting with the task force on Energy Consumption and Conservation here at our office, and i was in the office as early as 10 minutes before. It has been my attitude to be on time, if not a bit earlier to any commitment...be it a meeting in the office or even outside to meet someone. Mahihiya na ang mukha ko pag ako'y ma-late.

But what made me irritated today was that some guys don't care about your time, they lack respect, man. Some showed up 10 minutes late, a guy even showed up 30 minutes after the agreed time, the worst was that some guys didn't even showed up at all...damn! And we say...ahhh, life's too cruel, life's too difficult nowadays...our country's really poor, we're not moving forward (big bulls**t) and we don't even bother to do something about it, even with a mere respect of other's time. I hate these guys, man...

I hope they come across this post and knock their senses...they should know (they are old enough), time is one of the most precious resources. It is valuable. Time waits for no one and probably, nobody wants it wasted. It defines the beginnings and ends, and what we fill it up with, is what we get out of our lives. The sad reality is that we have all the time there is and yet we are not making more of it.

There are a lot of ways in respecting one's time. Preparing ahead of time is one, unpreparedness is a big waste. Of course, being on time and keeping on track...staying too long is also not good. And what do we get: a good reputation that will build an atmosphere of trust and goodwill.

Respecting time doesn't just help the other person...it reflects greatly on you as well. (Hayyyy, nakakalungkot at nakakaburat na rin kung minsan *buntong-hininga*)

Paalam...Kaibigan

Bertdey ko nung nakaraang araw...maraming bumati at marami ring nakalimot, pero suma total...masaya at kumpleto araw ko. Siyempre, ang aking misis, mga anak at magulang ang unang bumati, at nakatanggap rin ng regalo mula sa kanila maski papano. Maaga akong nagsimba at nagpasalamat sa ating Ama sa walang hanggang biyayang di nya naipagkakait. Isang pahina na naman ng aking buhay ang mag-uumpisa...pinagdasal ko pagkagising ng araw na yun, na sana'y tulungan at gawin pa nya akong mas mabuting kristyano.

Syempre, kailangan regaluhan ko rin aking ang sarili...una, maghapon akong di nagtrabaho. Binigyan ko rin ng "break" ang aking sarili. At pangalawa, naipangako ko sa aking sarili na kakalimutan ko na ang aking bisyo..."ang aking paninigarilyo". Nakadalawang araw na rin akong nagtitiis na walang hithit...mahirap at di ako mapakali pero kailangan kong tiisin. Hangga't maaari, di ko na babalikan ito. Matagal-tagal ko na rin binisyo ang sigarilyo at kung kukwentahin mo ang naipambili ko nito, baka nakapagpa-aral na ito ng isang "Nursing". Di naman ako yung tipong sugapa, sampung (10) sticks lang ang average ko sa maghapon...di ko kayang umubos ng isang kaha, pero, marami man o kaunting sticks ang ating nakukunsumo...bisyo pa rin yun. Walang pinagkaiba.

Kelan ba ako unang nanigarilyo...tagal na...3rd year high school...paisa-isa (at patago sa magulang...tagpas ang ulo ko pag nahuli akong me yosi). Ewan kung anong dahilan noon, siguro paporma, barkada. Nahuli nga ako minsan ng aking tatay, kalaboso inabot ko. Pagtungtong sa kolehiyo, ayan na...sineryoso ko na, palagi na akong me nakabulsang yosi. Lalo pa sa Baguio kung saan ako nag-aral, masarap at malamig ang simoy...napakasarap manigarilyo, walang pait. Mga barkada ko, mahihilig rin...pag wala na pambili, hati-hati na kami sa isang stick. Maalala ko pa, pag naninigarilyo ka at sinabihan ka na 50-50...ibig sabihin nun, ipasa mo na sa kanya ang yosi pag nangalahati na, sigurado 'ala siyang pambili.

Pagpasok ko sa trabaho, puro maninigarilyo rin kasama ko rito...talagang di makaiwas, puro kasi kami lalake rito. Noon di ko na tinago sa magulang ko ang bisyo...sarili ko na kasing pera ang pambili. Pero, sermon pa rin inaabot ko pag nakikita ako ng nanay ko...masama raw sa katawan, etc, etc...pero labas lang sa kaliwang tenga...Sabi ko sa sarili ko, "ngayun pa ba ako aayaw, eh malaki na ang puhunan ko rito"...hahaha

Noong bata kasi ako, siguro mga edad 11, mahilig kasing magpasindi ng sigarilyo ang aking lolo (sumalangit nawa). Pag nakatapos na yun ng tanghalian o hapunan, tatawagin na ako at magpapasindi na ng isang stick sa kusina, tamad siyang magsindi para sa sarili. Pagbigay ko sa kanya, baka nakadalawa o tatlo na akong hithit..."kasalanan mo 'to lolo, di mo namamalayan, naitri-training mo na pala ako pagyosi".

Pero nakakasawa na rin...parang inoobliga ko ang sarili ko na bago pumasok sa trabaho, eh me nakabulsa ng yosi na baon. Nagsasawa na utak ko pero hinahanap naman ng katawan...bisyo na talaga. Kaya isang buwan bago sumapit ang aking bertdey, pinangako ko sa sarili ko na titigilan ko na talaga ito, alam ko kaya ko naman ito. Sinabihan ko rin ang misis ko na alalayan ako't baka siya'y malingat, eh me hawak na naman akong yosi. Noong isang gabi...sinunod-sunod ko ang sindi, pinagsawa ko talaga sarili ko bilang pamamaalam sa aking paninigarilyo.

Pangalawang araw ko nang walang yosi...nawa'y di ako sumuway sa aking pangako. Kung kaya ng iba, sigurado kaya ko...

What I Did, What I did Not

I Love Sundays
Yesterday, Sunday, was a good day for me...it was time to sweat all that lard of fat off my belly.

As early as 5:00 am, my family and I together with a friend's family drove to Roxas Blvd, at the CCP Complex for some streching. A lot of people were there too for the same purpose or whatsoever. You could see a lot of activities, it is up to you on what would be your desired physical exertion or just hang around to clear all the clouds of pressure in your mind.

 

A lot of girls & guys danced their hearts out with aerobics and taebo...that i also did (also had a chance to peek at some of the world's nicest, curvaceous butts...i am a pervert, sometimes, if i have a chance) .


Some did fishing on the shores...that i didn't do (i'd rather go to the market and buy some fish, "effortless").

Some wandered around with their bikes...that i did minus the bike.

Some had their cute puppies and dogs for a walk...that i didn't, i have dog phobia.

Some kung fu dudes practiced their styles...that i didn't do, that is not my stuff.

Some whispered their sweet nothings on the shore...that I did, too (of course with my wife...who else?... i practice fidelity!)

A lot of families had a picnic under the trees...that we did (i liked the prepared "tapang kalabaw").

Some guys just laid on the grass for a continued sleep or stare at the sky for some daydreaming...that i did, i was daydreaming on how to get rich.

Next stop was Luneta for some sights...i just laid there on the grass and continued my daydreams. After which, kinumusta ko si Rizal (as suggested by Pareng Pepe...ok lang daw siya, "si Rizal"...visit him if you have a chance).

I love Luneta...lugar para sa mga taong gustong mamasyal kahit na walang pera, kagaya ko.

Afterwards, we had to go home, my wife had to drive, i still have to continue my daydreams in the car...then rest and slept for the rest of the day, Amen!

I Hate Mondays
A song from the Boomtown Rats, I really, really hate this day of the week & often suffer Monday sickness...
 

I Don't Like Mondays
The silicon chip inside her head.
Gets switched to overload,
And nobody's gonna go to school today,
She's going to make them stay at home,
And daddy doesn't understand it,
He always said she was as good as gold,
And he can see no reason.
Cos there are no reasons.
What reason do you need to be shown.

Tell me why.
I Dont't like Mondays.
I want to shoot.
The whole day down.

The Telex machine is kept so clean.
As it types to a waiting world,
And Mother feels so shocked,
Father's world is rocked,
And their thoughts turn to.
Their own little girl.
Sweet 16 ain't that peachy keen,
No, it ain't so neat to admit defeat,
They can see no reasons.
Cos there are no reasons.
What reason do you need to be shown,

Tell me why.
I Dont't like Mondays.
I want to shoot.
The whole day down.

All the playing's stopped in the playground now,
She wants to play with her toys a while.
And school's out early and soon we'll be learning
And the lesson today is how to die,
And then the bullhorn crackles,
And the captain crackles,
With the problems and the how's and why's
And he can see no reasons
Cos there are no reasons
What reason do you need to die

Tell me why.
I Dont't like Mondays.
I want to shoot.
The whole day down.

Signs of the Times

I had a chance to visit a long lost friend, Raul, last Sunday in Bulacan. He was in fact one of my 10-man barkada back in college. He called me up one time asking me to visit his house (got my number from one of the barkada) and get to know his family. So, I did, had a long drive together with my family to meet him...and was a bit amused on what i've seen...

Way back then, Raul was the kind of guy you don't want to mess around with...he was the so called "Bad Boy" in our school, intimidating everyone...because of his built and the way he lives his life. He was a known figure in the university's Guidance & Counseling office because of his notorious behavior...everybody then simply calls him "siRAUL-o". The school could not just kick him out...though he was a pain in the ass, he got brains, too. We were his only friends then, in fact his best friends, maybe because we understood him and we treated him as our brother...we had accepted him of what he was. The good thing about him was that he will never abandon you, defend you from your enemies and would in fact sacrifice his own life just for the sake of friendship. That was proven when one of our friend got a heated arguement in a small bar in Baguio...Raul did all the work, beat all the enemies black and blue...he really crushed them. He was in jail for a week because of that incident. After that, he gave his word: " that was all for you, never will i abandon you 'til the end"...indeed, this guy is fearless, a tough one, we thought.

One time i asked why on earth does he act like that...his reply was: "it is for my own survival...I got no family, my mom & dad were separated when i was young and now they have their own families, i have no relatives here...i only got you, my friends"...he is in solitude. So, from 2nd year until the end of college, the 10 of us were unseparable...we would share everything, from food, clothing and even our deep secrets...through thick and thin (kabutihan at kalukohan), we were brothers. But at the moment our eyes are not set on him, he would continue his wicked ways. That was his natural.

But the company has to end...after the last semester, nine of us have to come here in Manila for our board exam review. He was left in Baguio to finish some unfinished subjects...it was the most painful feeling we had...as much as possible, we would like to be with him but that was not possible...our lives have to move on. All he had to say before we parted was: " take care of yourselves, i would not be there to protect you...don't worry about me here. We would see each other again, someday."

Last Sunday, the first time i saw him again, we embraced for a minute...i was very, very glad to see him. I was in fact, in awe for while...the fearless guy is now a changed man...his face was pleasant, without his mustache trademark, he dresses well (not unlike before, shirts with soiled pants...very rugged), soft spoken...di na barumbadong magsalita at mahinhin ng gumalaw. He has a lovely wife with two healthy kids, and now a manager in a telecommunications company. I shoke my head and smiled when i saw him cook and fixed the table for our lunch...i have to approach him and ask, "pare, di ako makapaniwala...akala ko sa preso kita makikita, pero ang ganda na ng buhay mo ngayun. Anong nagyari ?". He replied: " pare, tinandaan ko yung huli mong sinabi sa akin noon bago tayo naghiwalay...na kung hindi ko babaguhin ang buhay ko, habang buhay akong magulo. Sinabi mo nun na mangarap ako, kaya ito ako...nagkaresulta na rin yun mga pangarap. Salamat sa 'yo, pare...ikaw ang pinaniwalaan ko noon". After that, he gave me another brothery hug...i felt very happy for him.

While writing this post, a song suddenly came into me...it was an old favorite from Van Halen, "Big Bad Bill (Is Sweet William Now)"... and it goes like this:

Had the whole town scared to death
When he walked by, they all held their breath
He's a fightin' man, sure enough
And then Bill got himself a wife, now he leads a different life
Big Bad Bill is Sweet William now

Married life done changed him somehow
He's the man the town used to fear
Now they all call him Sweet Papa Willy Dear
Stronger than Sampson I declare
'Til a brown-skinned woman's bobbed his hair

Big Bad Bill don't fight anymore (No, no, no)
He's doin the dishes an' moppin' up that floor (Yes he is)
Well he used to go out drinkin' lookin' for a fight
Now he gotta see that sweet woman every night
Big Bad Bill is Sweet William now

Dreams of Reason

 
...we found our names in a dream
we had farmhouse coffee and cream
colors and visions the test supreme
we made our lives your dreams...

Drunk Stoned High Wasted

I was really wasted yesterday night...had too much drink with my barkada in Antipolo. We were invited in one of a wealthy contractor's birthday. A sumptuous food was served with a whole "lechon na baka", still in its roasting bar as the main attraction on the table. Beer was flooding, no bottles, all in a beer dispenser and the theme that night is "drink all you can". But I opted to drink brandy, three of us consumed a 1.5-liter fundador while listening to a local band. The young dudes were mediocre playing smorgasbord songs...yeah, i didn't like it...everything was in disarray, feedbacks were there, mixing was worst, the sound was really poor...tunog lata, pero ok lang...maigi sa wala. Pinaka-badtrip, me nagvolunteer kumanta, ang pyesa..."Butsikek" ni Yoyoy Villame, nakakatawa pa, ang pangalan raw nya eh si "Donotbuy". Gusto pang humirit, Philippine Geography raw, inayawan ng banda at di alam ang tipa. Muntik ko ng agawin ang microphone at ipukpok sa ulo nya.

After the last drop of brandy, i felt i was really tired and drunk...i would know it if i am starting to talk too much. We left the party at aroung 1:30 am but ended up in a local videoke bar for some "washing"...we call it panghugas and beer would be the drink. I had a couple of them + 1 angel sitting right beside me, just cheap talks, nothing more. The last beer really wasted me and i didn't know what happened next...it was already 4:00 in the morning when i got home.

I didn't report for work today...hilong-hilo pa ako, the best i've done so far was sleep the whole day. Lubog na ang araw ng gumising ako kanina. Nasabi pati ng misis ko na napakasarap naman ng buhay ko sa araw na to...naglasing, di nagtrabaho at tulog maghapon. My reply was..."akala mo madaling uminon, sige, ikaw ang uminom at maglasing, tignan natin kung kaya mo". But it was only a joke and she understands....i don't do this as a habit, occasional lang.

Just a while back i drove my wife & kids at Jolibee ni Morong, Rizal for a treat...yan ang tinatawag na pangsuhol. One good thing about the drink last night..."nagtira ako ng pang-uwi" and mind you, i also follow the "10 commandments para sa manginginom"...it would really guide you, i guess.

Self-Portrait

 

Metal's self-portrait ? Hell, no! It was just the result of my big boredom during today's training...the so called "Restore Training" here at the plant's conference room. It was all about finance, purchasing procedures, accounting, capital budget, etc, etc...which it didn't interest me that much this morning. My mind was wandering out of this world i haven't paid any attention to what the resource speaker was talking about.

I wasn't aware i was holding a paper and a pencil, with my mind alienated, sketching this silly thing. I have this fondness of sketching weird creatures, myth characters...anything scary....i don't know why. Pa-baduy na ng pabaduy ang post ko talaga....

A Grand Time in Laguna

Nakakaburat na...ngayun, mula 8:00 am hanggang 3:30 pm, wala akong ginawa kundi gumawa ng monthly report, masakit na mga mata at puwet ko. Malapit na ang katapusan, hangga't maari di pa dumarating ang month-end, inuumpisahan ko nang gumawa...di ko style yung naghahabol ng mga report pag katapusan na, mas masakit sa ulo. "Cramming" ika nga. Retired na ako sa style na yun...estudyante pa ako ugali ko na, inalis ko na yun. Pampaalis muna ng suya, eto...makapagsulat nga ng blog.

 
I have nothing in particular to brag at this moment...ah, maibida na lang ang gimik ko nung linggo. It was one of the grandest time I had for a long time. Me and six of my barkadas (together with our respective families) had a trip to Lumban, Laguna, the home of lansones and rambutan. We drove our cars in "convoy" for a 2-hour trip to a certain "hot spring" resort. The place was very simple yet it was one of the most serene places i've seen...lots of trees (rambutan, lansones & whatever), fruits, some wildlife in cages (wild boar, snakes, lots of birds, monkeys, etc). Most in particular is the fresh air which is much, much cleaner than here at the plant. You'd feel a big relief when the wind blows on you...my lungs felt the comfort it brings.
 

The water was so fresh, the pool was filled up just when we arrived. I had a good time with my wife and kids at talagang nag-enjoy sila sa lugar na yun, pati pag-kain, super sarap...inihaw na tilapia na gumagalaw pang binili sa palengke sa lugar na yun. Meron ding inihaw na bangus, talong + kamatis + alamang, barbeque, sinigang na babuy, kilawin tanigue, pansit, mga prutas at ewan kung anu pa yung iba. Naglublub ako sa tubig maghapon (di ako lumanguy at di naman ako marunong) at talagang nakaramdam ako ng ginhawa...malayo sa trabaho, malayo sa traffic, malayo sa mga asungot sa paligid, maski panandalian lang.

Natutuwa ako sa mga anak ko at sa mga anak ng mga barkada ko...di mo maipinta ang kasiyahan sa kanilang mga mukha. Alam ko di lang sa tubig o sa lugar na yun ang naging kaligayahan nila kundi ang makita nila na ang buong pamilya maski gaano kahirap ang buhay ay sama-sama...maski sa panadaliang kasiyahan lamang.

Tama nga si Sampaguita..."Laguna, nang ito ay marating ko, para bang ako'y nagbago...kakaibang damdamin"

Sampung Utos sa Manginginom

Habang ako'y nagpapapalit ng "clucth disc" ng sasakyan nung sabado dun sa talyer ni Mang Toti, me napansin akong isang papel na nakapaskil sa isang dingding habang naghihintay. Medyo na-amuse ako kaya't minarapat kong kopyahin at ibahagi. Tinanung ko si Mang Toti kung sino me gawa nito...sabi nya, silang mga mekaniko...naniniwala ako dahil ugali kasi nilang mag-inom ng Tanduay o Emperador pagkatapos ng maghapong trabaho.

Sampung Utos para sa mga Tomador

1. Huwag makulit habang umiinom.
2. Huwag matakaw sa pulutan. Ito'y pangsapin lang at di panghapunan.
3. Huwag patagalin ang baso sapagkat me naghihintay rin sa susunod na tagay...ika nga, "di baling magtagal sa suso, huwag lang sa baso".
4. Huwag matutulog habang nag-iinom.
5. Di basta umiinom o nakikiinom lang, bumili rin. Sa madaling salita, mag-ambag ka.
6. Ilagay ang alak sa tiyan, huwag sa ulo.
7. Huwag pakalasing, magtira ng pang-uwi.
8. Huwag basta aalis habang nag-iinom, magpaalam naman.
9. Siguraduhing sa bahay ang diretso pag-uwi.
10. Huwag mananakit ng asawa, lambingin lamang ito at kung maari ay suhulan ng maski ano (halimbawa, pansit) para payagan ulit sa susunod na paalam sa pag-iinom.

Nagtataka si Mang Toti habang kinukopya ko ito, sabi ko'y ikakalat ko ito...malay mo baka makatulong pa ito sa iba. Nangingiting bumalik sya dun sa kanyang ginagawa.

metal's Dreadful Ordeals

I have to reveal these scary, if not, painful experiences out to get these off my nerves...

1. Once Bitten, Twice Shy: When i was 8 years old, i was fond of picking up "tansans" (bottle tops) in the neighborhood, pound them flat and convert it into an improvised tamborine. Sometimes these tops are good as bets in "tatsing". While walking along an empty street, in front of a big nipa house...a group of dogs (five of them), i still remember it clearly, came running towards me each giving their own bite. Had 25 anti-rabbies shot after that. After a year, my pet puppy accidentally bit me...had another 25 shots. Three years ago (from now), after a drinking session, a neighbor's dog (who had just given birth) run after me and gave me her share...6 shots in a row. That's 25+25+6...56 shots (too painful). Result is, i have now this dog trauma...whenever i see one, i sweat profusely and call all the saints that i know. It's thrice bitten, twice shy.
2. Billy's Got a Gun: It was a summer of my 2nd year in college, a friend called me up one night telling me to meet him in a secluded local bar in Baguio. We were meeting a guy for a talk with some illegal business (please don't ask about the business, it's hallucinating) so i had to go there. There was my friend with an odd-looking, goon-looking guy just sitting beside him. We had a couple of beer while talking some business, then my friend just said..."my friend here can play a guitar and sing", i think he uttered that because the bar has a small stage with a couple of instruments at rest. The guy requested me to sing a few, but i refused telling him that i feel awkward. The guy just pulled out a gun, put it the table and said, "it's your choice...kakanta ka o hindi". I don't know what's got into him. No choice...i have to pick up the acoustic guitar, put my butt on the stool at the stage and sang: Himig Natin (by J dela Cruz), Dust in the Wind (by Kansas) and Operator (by Croce), last one was Sweet Baby James by James Taylor (i loved folk songs then). Yeah, singing while looking at a gun on a table. I almost fainted afterwards.
3. Trial by Fire: 1994, two days before New Year, me and my family went home to Pangasinan (from Rizal) for a family reunion. My brother with his family (just came from Canada) were there, our eldest sister with her family (who just came from US) and our youngest sister are all present, with our Mom & Dad. We were having a grand conversation at the sala then an unusual sound just came off the ceiling..."ksssssst". It was an electrical failure, and after a while, our house, just newly painted in preparation on my siblings arrival from abroad, was up in smoke...the house was on fire. We all scramppled out of the house and watch it engulfed by fire. Each one of us was crying, nothing was saved, even a single clothing, we have to stay at my aunt's house for the meantime. What a reunion, too tragic...after a year, we started rebuilding a new house for my folks. Now they're ok.
4. In Sickness & in Health: I had this illness in the year 1996, i'm damn sick i had to leave work and had a pain taking medicine for two months. It was the lowest moment of my life, i though i'd die. But God was so good, he gave me my second chance...and i'm not wasting it.
5. Dad's Alright: 2004, the greatest fear i had...when Dad fainted in an FX taxi after a run around at a mall in the province. He was brought to a nearby hospital but was advised we'd bring him to the Philippine Heart Center. The doctor made an advise for us not to waste time and look for some blood donors, 15 healthy men minimum. He was tentatively diagnosed of a very rare heart disease...a very difficult situation and chances were very slim...we all broke down. I've called everyone that i know for some blood, i was hiding my emotions then making myself strong. When everything was ready, the doctors made their final diagnostics (very expensive tests and laboratories). One day, he called us telling that the first findings were incorrect and that Dad's not that ill, he's free from his heart operation. Suddenly the sun shone, birds were singing and i felt a mountain just came off my back. Indeed, it was a miracle and we were all crying with joy. God is truly great and Dad's now as healthy as a horse.

I was thinking of another part of this post which is "metal's Dark Secrets"...but nah, that'll be too personal. I have countless of them, very, very dark, indeed...but i'll keep it in my closet for a while, bring these with me to my grave. This will be my last post if i do that.

Kapitan Kidlat

Haaay, ano ba naman ito, kuya...talagang minamalas ako nitong linggong ito. Panay tigil itong operation at di na normal tong pangaraw-araw na buhay ko. Magmula kahapon hanggang ngayun, panay palya ang isang "frequency drive" dito at di ko pa makita ang dahilan. Matindi na ang pressure ng mga big boss at di na sila nasisiyahan. Dalawang gabi na akong di natutulog dahil dito sa bwakang na problema. Pag electrical ang issue o dahilan ng isang "trouble", napakahirap hanapin ang pinagmulan...buti sana kung sunog ang isang control card, at least kita mo na...papalitan mo na lang, pero wala eh, basta na lang titirik...buset talaga.

Nag-umpisa kasi ang lahat ng isang lunes ng hapon eh umulan ng malakas, galit na galit na hinaluan ng malalakas na kidlat. Mula noon, nagkalintik na 'tong drive na to. Ngayun, nangangapa pa rin ako. Gusto ng pumikit ng mga mata ko at makatikim naman ng kaunting tulog pero paano...di pa rin nahuhuli ang problema. Tanging ina naman oo...

Pasensya na sa mga magaspang na salita, habang sinusulat ko to, pinapahinga ko lang ang utak ko na ewan kung me laman pa o puno na ng kalituhan. Naisulat ko na nga lang itong pakiramdam ko para maibsan naman at pagbalik ko mamaya dun sa problema kong drive, medyo maluwag uli sa dibdib.

Isa pa nga..."Cooking ng ina"...agrrr!

Alas dos y medya na ng umaga...tulog na ang nga angel samantalang narito pa rin ako sa trabaho pero di ko naman aayawan ito. Ika nga, ang umaayaw, di nagwawagi. Kaya ko 'to...sabi nga nung isang reteradong boss ko dati..."kaya mo yan, gawa lang ng tao yan!". Sige!

Inner Voice (In the eyes of a blogger)

It has been two months now since I have started this blogsite, and in that span I have learned so much, from scratch, I was able to costumize the layout on what i feel best represents me. I have never imagine about getting into CSS and HTML tweaks, more so with some Macromedia and photo editing applications , but look, I am beginning to interest and understand these. Learning new things gives you a better outlook in life. But the main point of this experience is the way to handle things...how you express your thoughts, your feelings or sentiments and your understanding, the capacity of rational thought or perceptions.

Technically, blogging (from the word "Weblog") defined as a personal, even commercial site that uses a date format containing links and commentaries for others' views. The main content are the webmaster's aritcles which are regularly updated...too shallow.

In my point, it is a personal site of people's inner thoughts and their emotions (be it good or bad), honest views, observations, confusions, accomplishements, hapiness, desperations, solitudes, inspirations, beliefs, etc. It is their personal being that is symbolized and everyone is priviliged to have a view of them... it'll be up to us to interpret and reflect on these messages, dig and learn from them. I have read a lot of blogger's posts, seen a number of their sites and begin to understand how others define the meaning of life...some take it too seriously and some in contrast articulate it lightly. Some speak of morbidity, some speak of enduring memories, a lot are intellegent writers with excellent posts, some say it in few words, some are very objective, some are carefree and even some talk about their sex lives, defining every details...but I say, all of them are unpretentious people expressing their genuine thoughts. It would be up to us, readers, to construe their meaning and reflect on these purposes. It would definitely make us more wiser and appreciative.

The most striking thing about blogging is "meeting" a lot of "virtual friends", accepting their existence and trying to learn from them. It has been surprising to discover how people connect with each, how they think, how they react, how each one walks in when the world walks out. Indeed, though mysterious, life is not so lonely after all...

In Honor of Baknoy's Query

As promised on the "Age of Innocence" comments'...it would be an honor to answer baKNOY's queries. He wasn't the first to ask but I guess it would be the time to tell about the evolution of "metal_ears". Just the fun of it, ok?
To quote baKNOY's' comment: "hmm..tanong ko lang.. are we suppose to grow out of that? if so, when? and why is your blog black? and why is it called metal ears? do you really have metal ears? are they heavy? do they hurt? why am i asking so much? oh my. go...i haven't grown out of it yet... and im already 21..hehehe peace metal! babe is cool. he's a pig, and he talks. nuff said! have a nice day."
To answer: Q: Are we suppose to grow out of that? (i guess, referring to the perpetual questioning of a child) - surely no, we aren't suppose to grow out of that. Life is a never ending conquest for truth. From the Nike ad: " There is no finish line!". Q: If so, when? - No, no, no please...don't stop asking questions. Dead brains only do that. Q: And why is your blog black? - Well, from the basic Web Design tips, "try colors, styles and fonts that compliment each other"...Since metal_ears is my alias, surely i would go with the color that represents metal (pink will be a no, no). I thought of silver, nah (too dry)...blue, hmm...could be, black? why not...a lot of metal sites have black backgrounds, and red often comes with it...yes, Black, a Red and Gray with a little touch of Yellow and Sky Blue. White font. Q: Why is it called metal ears? - Here it goes, when i was in 2nd year high school, i got this old CBS Sony heavy metal tape (various artists) from a friend. It was a good selection tape with likes of Cheap Trick, Aerosmith, Heart, Boz Scaggs, Ted Nugent, Euclid Beach Band, Bruce Springsteen and so on. It was so good, i really liked it. But the thing is, the tape's case was lost so i have to provide one and replenish the cover. I did a little drawing for the cover with some colors then thought of a title..."Selection" doesn't sound good, "Various Artists"...nah, too common, so i thought of...why not "For Metal Listeners". Title still lengthy so i finally thought. "Metal Ears". Yeah, sounds good...that's it..."METAL EARS". (corny no?...hahaha). But at least me pinagmulan. From then on, i kept the name (and kept the tape, too...it's sooo old, but still cool). Q: Do you have metal ears? - Yeah, i think so, not only that, even my heart posses that...i love heavy metal (from 19 kupongkupong 'til now). People say, too loud, noise pollution, addicts' sounds, I say to them "oh yeah, up yours, fuck your disco !" Q: Are they heavy? - Yeah, "unliterally", yeah...really heavy. Q: Do they hurt? - Absolutely nope...in fact, feels even better, it's anti-gravity, man! Q: Why am i asking too much? - Sure, baKNOY...because you're cool and normal. You still have that child within...like most of us.

To baKNOY, many thanks, bro...this post was inspired by you!

Age of Innocence

I had a chance to watch an HBO program with my 5-year old kid last night. We were comfortably lying down in bed, his head resting on my shoulder as we watch. It was an old movie about the adventures of a talking pig, "Babe", together with its assorted talking animal friends. Well, this is not the first time that my son had watched this movie, surely he must have seen it a couple of times but he really adores these types. He would, in fact tell you what would happen on the next scene or episode. I, too was mermerize with it...imagine, a pig talking to a dog, together working as a sheepdog?

But the funny thing is that, through the span of the movie, he had this attitude of perpetual questionings, asking everything he sees or anything deemed necessary to satisfy his curiosity. He must have asked questions a hundred or so...every minute that if ever you lack a good-natured tolerance, surely you would blow your top.

He would ask:

Ian: Papa, bakit may putik ang paa ni "Babe"?

Me: Kasi, naglaro at naghabulan sila ng aso.

Ian: Eh, bakit sila naglaro ng aso?

Me: Magkaibigan kasi sila kaya sila naglalaro.

Ian: Bakit sila magkaibigan?

Me: Kasi magkasama lang sila sa isang bahay kaya sila magkaibigan.

Ian: Bakit sila magkasama sa bahay?

Me: Eh, kasi nga magkaibigan sila...

He pauses for a second, then here it goes again...

Ian: Bakit sila magkaibigan?

Me: Ian, manood ka na lang...

Handling children's questions is a skill, it requires thought about the questions being asked identifying the likely motive for asking it and the knowledge on how to turn a question into a useful starting point of an investigation. One article that I read is that, some of the children's questions should not be answered directly but must be handled to stimulate a discussion between the two of you. That would in fact contributes the developement of his thinking.

One sample is that:

Child: How do birds weave their nests?

Dad: They're clever...

Child: Birds are clever with their beaks. Nobody would ever think because they're small.

Dad: Yes, it's wonderful, isn't it?

From the part of our conversation last night, obvioulsy I don't have the skill, yet it would be best to try and learn the best answer to every child's questioning. Who knows, we might learn more from these kids.